Twas the night before Christmas for the boys in the bar,
Peace St. was so quiet, and in the parking lot… two cars.
The boys looked in shock at the note that was left,
In their hearts there was anger, and their souls were bereft.
As for Mad Muddles Bannon, he thought he might faint,
It was pinned to the wall with a sharp candy cane,
And there, on the bar, was a small model plane.
It seemed their conflict would end as quick as it began,
It was time for the boys to come up with a plan.
“Where would he take him?” said Joey, ever rational,
There was only one place. “Raleigh Durham International.”
A gust of wind blew and the door pitched with a squeak
In walked two of the girls who had been there that week.
“I’m sorry we’re closing,” Bannon said with urgency,
“We’ve gotta leave town on a family emergency.”
The girls rushed out the door, trying not to hover.
But it was hard to sit idle for two Muddle Lovers.
They couldn’t help but notice the boys’ frenzy and pallor
“Here, in case you need it. Sorry, it’s only eight dollars.”
They sped out the driveway, up the street, to the right.
The girls pondered what tragedy had befallen that night.
They picked up a note , leaning over it, huddled.
“Nuggets!” Ras exclaimed, “Someone’s harming our Muddles!”
They ran to the car, getting ready for war,
For the day they had trained their whole lives for.
They started the beetle, “We gotta go!” Nuggets cried.
Rassy stepped on the gas, “On, White Devil! We Ride!”
Patrons came and went, some gathered ’round the door,
Wanting whiskeys, vodkas, beers, all priced 4.
They shrugged at the sign, neither shocked, nor surprised.
The boys ignored every law on the street as they sped,
Be it stop sign, merge left, or lights turning red.
Joey stayed focused, with his hands on the wheel.
Zac closed his eyes, fearing the loss of his last meal.
Tyler leaned forward, urging Joey to go faster,
His precious Jamie was missing, he was going to kill that bastard.
Chris said nothing, though everything seemed to slow down.
The time, at last, had come, for their final showdown.
Joey veered off the exit toward RDU,
“What do you think, boys? Terminal one or two?”
“Well, Terminal one is so old, and it’s not yet converted.”
“And there’s only AirTran and Southwest, it should be deserted.”
So the foursome decided, terminal one it would be,
“Once we get inside, split up and try to find Jamie.”
As for Muddles, he knew which route he would take,
He had no doubt exactly where he would find Jake.
There was a part of the building that was closed for repairs,
Chris went there sometimes to work through his troubles and cares.
He slipped through the restricted door, knew it wasn’t far.
He navigated the darkness, to that broken down old bar.
There were preparations laid out for a Bartender’s Duel,
“Now, little Muddle, shall we go over the rules?”
“We both make a drink, a crazy mixture of booze,”
“We switch, then dissect which ingredients were used.”
Chris took his station, and Jake did the same,
He hoped the guys found Jamie, while he played this little game.
The guys stood together, making their plan of attack.
And they noticed two girls, standing over them, to the back.
Those same two girls they had seen at the bar.
“Oh great, we made it, you didn’t get too far.”
The guys looked at them, expressions befuddled.
“Relax guys. Guardian Angels! We protect the Muddles!”
Zac and Joey accepted, too tired to argue,
But Tyler, exasperated, yelled “Who the hell are you?!”
One put her arm around Tyler, with a satisfied sigh.
“That’s Ras, and I’m Agent Nuggets, cutie pie.”
“And what are you doing here?” he said, at a loss.
“We are here to save Muddles and help you get your boss.”
They tore through the terminal, checking every locked door,
Until they found him, surrounded by luggage on the floor.
Jamie had dressed in every outfit from the unclaimed bags,
From uniforms to costumes… even in drag.
Ras said, “Sorry I have to break up your fun,”
“But we’re here to get you home, so it’s time that we run.”
Muddles, for his part, was still battling strong.
Seven rounds, drink for drink, and neither one had been wrong.
Both had the strength and stamina to endure.
But with each drink that passed, their vision started to blur.
Bright lights found them, and a familiar voice sounded.
“Hey, I see a bar!” Zac said. “I think I found it!”
Tyler picked up Chris, while Joey held Jake at bay.
And Zac cleared a long path, so they could all get away.
Chris, in his drunken state, was throwing a fit,
“No! Take me back! I gotta muddle some shit!”
Jake let out a roar and the whole building shook.
This was far from over, he didn’t care how long it took.
They made it out the door, and knew they wouldn’t get far.
The beetle screeched to a halt. “Get in the god damn car!”
Joey ran to Ras’s side, all of them grateful to be alive.
“If Joey is in the car, honey, then Joey drives.”
“How are we all gonna fit?” They all thought and they thunk
Ras said “Two in front, four in back, and one in the trunk.”
The guys looked at Tyler, who shook his head right away.
“You must be out of your mind, there’s no fucking way!”
Ras opened the trunk, and tossed out a few books,
“See?! You’ll be fine, it’s much bigger than it looks.
He argued until Nuggets pulled the taser from her pocket.
As the currents flowed she said, “Toss his ass in there, and lock it!”
They jumped in the car, and were all on their way,
They escaped Jake’s wrath, and could fight another day.
There was no sight sweeter than pulling up to the bar.
Above it there shined the brightest and prettiest of stars.
The most important thing was salvaged, they still hadn’t lost it
They opened the door and dragged themselves in, exhausted.
They tossed Tyler in a booth, so he could sleep off his shock.
Jamie sat by the tree, and looked up at the clock.
Midnight had struck, and it pleased him to say,
“You guys, we made it, it’s Christmas day.”
“The greatest present I’ve got, is having friends like you.”
“And I’m sure that my friendship, is your greatest present too.”
Around him eyes narrowed, and he saw eyebrows lift,
“Fine, pour us a round, and I’ll get you your gifts!”
The doors opened wide, and the masses poured in,
For the Black Flower’s gift is, and always has been:
To be a home, and a family, to those who have none,
And for those that do, well it’s just a shitload of fun.
It’s a rare kind of place, that excepts you as you are,
And that’s why Black Flower is a miracle of a bar.
So if you’re in the Raleigh area, be sure to take a peek
Follow the brightest star to 517 w. Peace St.
May your Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanza be Merry
Happy Holidays to you all!